What Now?

Just got an email this morning about some creepy guy driving around Leduc in a brown minivan, following women around to try to abduct them. This happened to someone just the other day I guess. She phoned the cops with his license plate number and that number is registered to a totally different vehicle.

You know, shopping with two toddlers if stressful enough, thank you very much. A while back someone was stealing purses from shopping carts in the parking lots while you put your groceries in the car. So now as soon as you get to your vehicle, throw the kids in! check Throw your purse in! check Okay, now throw yourself in before the creepy guy in the minivan pulls up! check Now who is going to load my groceries in the truck?

Anyways, if all the sleazeball wants is to abduct someone WHY DOESN'T HE DRIVE HIS ASS TO JASPER AVE IN HIS SHITTY MINIVAN AND TAKE HIS PICK! I know that's mean...... nobody deserves that, but really, wouldn't that be a lot easier?! Maybe it's just me.

Why Do I Do These Things?

It was last summer when my mom and I ended up standing with a group of shoppers at Walmart, watching a knife presentation. It was one of those things when you watch the presentation you get a really good deal on a knife set. The knife that impressed us the most was a long knife that would cut through anything. It slices, it dices! It cuts through bone , and yes, hammers!! Hammers? When the hell would someone need to cut into a hammer? Anyways, we chipped in together and bought the set and continued on.

Now we'll skip ahead to present day, actually to Tuesday. It started out fine, had my coffee, did some cleaning, and was thinking about maybe going to do some shopping (which I wish we did do). Well I got the urge to try to get a toy out that is stuck in the wall in Erika's room. (She has a hole in her wall made from the doorknob and in the spring they put a couple princess toys through the hole. So I took a couple hangers and taped them together, put a wad of packing tape on the end and stuck it in the hole to fish out the toys. I rescued Snow White, but Belle I couldn't find.) I don't know why I can't let this go.

So I tried on Tuesday with the hangers again but failed. So I get this stupidest idea I have ever had. I put my vaccuum hose in the hole and stuck it way in there, turned on the machine, but I couldn't find the toy. So I turned it off and tried to pull the hose out. IT GOT STUCK!! The hole faces the back of the bathroom tub so the end of my hose was stuck there under the tub. I panicked! I had to get my hose out! I have to cut the wall more! Oh my god! Why didn't I go shopping!!!??? I go in the kitchen and grab my super knife I bought last year and start sawing away at the wall. The girls stopped playing and came and watched in horror as I hacked away. I felt so bad. I ended up cutting a long gap about 2 feet long and about a few inches wide down enough so I could reach my arm in there and get the hose out. I have to say the knife cut through the wall like butter! Darren wasn't too impressed with me. Erika asked me, "Mommy, why you cut a hole in my wall?" Then I felt REALLY BAD! I think I need a job.

Deep Thoughts

"When I found the skull in the woods, the first thing I did was call the police. But then I got curious about it. I picked it up, and started wondering who this person was, and why he had deer horns." - Jack Handy

Let's go Oilers, Let's go!!

Well, haven't written in a while. Not much new going on I guess. BUT OILERS HOCKEY STARTS TONIGHT!! I am a little excited I have to admit. Not a huge hockey fan but I enjoy watching Oilers play. Another good thing about hockey starting is actually getting out of the house and going to friends houses to watch the games. I'm a bit sad however that Ryan Smyth is gone. There are so many new players now so I don't even know who anyone is. I am sure Darren hates that because I am always asking him questions while he's watching like "Who is he? What team did he come from? How old is he?" That probably drives him!

Horcoff is still there which is good because I have liked him from the start. So ya, busy night for tv tonight. Survivor and hockey! Good thing hockey starts after Survivor or we'd be fighting for the remote! Anyways....Chow for now!

Deep Thoughts

"One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh no," I said, "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late."- Jack Handy

Oh my god!! I miss the old Saturday Night Live soooo much!!